"You don't have to think about doing the right thing. If you're for the right thing, then you do it without thinking."
~ Maya Angelou

April 5, 2011

Been Too Long

Writing is such a wonderful opportunity to release and thus reflect.  I lost sight of this opportunity over the last several weeks, so now it is time to get back to it.  Was it because I had a firm grasp on where I was? Where I wanted to go? Or simply just me being unmotivated or uninspired to write.  Today was a 50/50 day, some good, some bad, so I now find myself with a need to write about it, just write... It is hard to believe that it has been almost 2 years since I have been employed.  So much has transpired since I resigned from my last place of employment.  However, as much good that has transpired from that move to leave, I find myself questioning what the next chapter will look like.  I understand that I must be patient as the current opportunities for employment are difficult to obtain due to the state of the economy, but is it really just that in itself?  This is the part that gets me twisted at times as I attempt to figure out what honestly can not be.  For example, is it a matter of qualifications or experience?  Is it the gap in time since my last employment?  The name on the page? The university that puts me in a different class, although I don't remember being asked to be.  http://sowkweb.usc.edu/index.php

See, there I go again being a little hard on myself, but I guess it is somewhat of a natural process based on the time that I have been off, and the efforts I have made to find and land another employment opportunity.
I keep telling myself that when the work is ready for me, I will be ready for the work and that really is the approach that I have maintained.  However, today is one of those days (far and few) that has me down a little, trying to figure out the when, why, and how...  I must go through this so that I can pause, reflect, understand, and thus take action.  Will there be an employment opportunity down the road that will lead to many wonderful opportunities, absolutely!  Will I continue to go through the process of the 50/50  days absolutely! Will I get through it absolutely!  So, this is where I am at clear as can be with no misunderstanding, it just is what it is.  Until we meet again as always breathe well.

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